Punctuality and punctuation get me going. Mrs. McBigTime and I have been in a partnership for so long that we shudder to imagine online dating. Not to yuck anyone’s yum, but even imagining what sort of cringy MySpace malarky I’d have on my profile makes me nauseous. “I’ll cook you dinner if you cook me
The oatmeal chocolate chip cookies I baked a few weeks ago have been enshrined into the permanent rotation. Cooking and baking are like art and science, left brain and right. The former is boundless, untethered from the rules and formalities in baking. What happens if you add too much or too little of one thing
Sometimes, when I tell someone about my family dynamic, it strikes them as peculiar. “Are you and your wife going to have any more kids?” Absolutely not. One sixth grader is enough, and we have a mountain of cats—five of them. Add in our frenetic border collie, Rosie, and the house is full. My parents
Unless you asked me a direct question about food or sports, I was a child who was very shy around adults. Fighting a reputation for being “rude” to small-town folks because I couldn’t even muster please and thank you on Halloween or at the grocery store was tough. The best way to hone interpersonal communication
Sometimes, life is stressful. It isn’t always tailgating parties and Daisy Dukes like Morgan Wallen sings about. Most of the time, going through a day makes me realize a lot of music is just pandering bull crap. It feels more like Hank Williams Sr. and his crushing, heartache-laced blues. Bills are piling up, and my
“Dirty Ernie” finally kicked the bucket. Ernest Hubbard was my mom’s dad and had one hell of a biography to tell. Ernie lived to the ripe age of 87 and filled those years from Shawnee, Oklahoma, to Northern California with every story and trinket imaginable. He was the ultimate girl dad, though his four daughters
Bo McBrayer brings the spice with his Week 4 fantasy football advice, giving you the musings and information you need to keep your lineups “hot-n-ready.” I wonder if everyone has a party trick—a little unique thing you do well to impress people in social settings. Mine is “really lame,” according to my wife, but I
Believing in New York to pull off the unlikely victory in Week 1 was most definitely not my finest moment of the week, but I did also advise others to be cautious about the small likelihood of that. I can't beat myself too much over believing in the Giants, as Wan'Dale Robinson did deliver in Week 1's predictions via "Storyline, Storytime."
But fear not, folks. It’s early in the season, and there is plenty of time to fill those holes and right the ship. Here are players at every position that can help you get on your way to victory in Week 2 of fantasy football action and beyond.
Should I give out bad advice, I’m not really the sentimental type. Being apologetic for failing to predict the future seems disingenuous, anyway. The fine folks at Optimus want me to contribute the stuff that spills from my eyes, ears, and nose, so this column will put just that at your fingertips. Should it aid you in a redraft or dynasty league victory, or even a DFS lineup, that’s cool beans. I aim to win in an entertaining way, so they don’t ever sack me for being boring. Bring on the rush, I’ll stand tall (or scramble) the only way I know: with pizzazz.
