by Bo McBrayer

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Published On: November 16th, 2024

Sometimes, when I tell someone about my family dynamic, it strikes them as peculiar. “Are you and your wife going to have any more kids?” Absolutely not. One sixth grader is enough, and we have a mountain of cats—five of them. Add in our frenetic border collie, Rosie, and the house is full.

My parents split up when I was young. Then my mom remarried into a gigantic family with tangled vines of second and third cousins hanging from the family tree. Christmas was often a parade of homes so that all my aunties and nanas could get red-eyed photos and pinch cheeks while offloading itchy pajamas in ill-fitting sizes. The interesting thing I always noticed was that every tree was a natural silver tip fir cut from the Sierra Nevada mountains, and none of the pets lived inside.

This will be the first Christmas in our house without my Australian Shepherd, Dusty. For over a decade, we had to double-wrap presents under the tree because he would hike his leg to mark his territory on it. It was infuriating because it was the only time he did that in the house. The switch to an artificial tree was met with some friction from the homemakers from deep in the brambles, not that we were concerned about the passive aggressiveness. We decided the gifts meant for the crotchety corner would be laid under a separate natural tree to be pissed on.

Though the wrapping paper might not be sticky this year, three of those cats will be experiencing their first Christmas. Reggie, in particular, is a wild child with a love for parkour. Juney is a ribbon eater. And Zero-F’s-Tux and Jinx-Owe-Me-A-Coke will have all the ornaments off the tree before it’s even set up.

Pet allergies might not be my greatest concern this winter.

Check Out Our Week 11 Fantasy Football Rankings ~

Week 11 Fantasy Football: Iron and Crimson

Fraught Iron

This millennium has gifted us with a couple of contentious decades between the Ravens and the Steelers. Most of those clashes focused on dominant defense on each side. I don’t get that vibe about this year’s interaction. The Baltimore defense has been a sieve, while the portly Pittsburgh unit from the beginning of the season has cooled off in recent weeks. Nevertheless, I feel the strength of both offenses might be lending influence. Lamar Jackson is playing at an unworldly level, while Russell Wilson has silenced a lot of doubters (including me). We could get a really modern shootout between two traditionally brutish teams.

Waldron Suck Boost

I’m not jumping ship on Caleb Williams just yet. He was issued a shit sandwich for an opening salvo with Shane Waldron. The reason Williams looks unprepared is because he and Waldron entered each contest without a working plan. We might be looking at a lost season for fantasy purposes in 2024, but the sky is still the limit as long as Chicago can agree not to hire another lemon at offensive coordinator.

Green Bay comes screaming in off their bye week and ready to light up the scoreboard. They mustn’t expect that to be easy against a swarming Bears pass defense. Jordan Love has a tendency to make mistakes against stronger defenses at a higher frequency. I still trust at least Jayden Reed and Tucker Kraft in this compelling matchup.

Bleu Cheese Pressing

What a great blessing this midseason overture is between Kansas City and Buffalo. I want to believe Josh Allen is ready to prove his team is a tier above the undefeated champs this season. The Chiefs have triumphed on shaky ground in consecutive games. I know neither of those teams are eye to eye with the Bills.

Patrick Mahomes and Travis Kelce have resumed their autumn waltz and are back in our good graces. Deandre Hopkins has exceeded my expectations. You really love to see it. For at least one more week, Kareem Hunt will have RB1 upside. The Bills have been a run funnel so far.


Find more spicy advice from Bo McBrayer on Bluesky or on  X (formerly Twitter) @Bo_McBigTime & up your kitchen pantry game with his custom spices and sauces at hotboxbatch.com.

November 16th, 2024

by Bo McBrayer

Share

Sometimes, when I tell someone about my family dynamic, it strikes them as peculiar. “Are you and your wife going to have any more kids?” Absolutely not. One sixth grader is enough, and we have a mountain of cats—five of them. Add in our frenetic border collie, Rosie, and the house is full.

My parents split up when I was young. Then my mom remarried into a gigantic family with tangled vines of second and third cousins hanging from the family tree. Christmas was often a parade of homes so that all my aunties and nanas could get red-eyed photos and pinch cheeks while offloading itchy pajamas in ill-fitting sizes. The interesting thing I always noticed was that every tree was a natural silver tip fir cut from the Sierra Nevada mountains, and none of the pets lived inside.

This will be the first Christmas in our house without my Australian Shepherd, Dusty. For over a decade, we had to double-wrap presents under the tree because he would hike his leg to mark his territory on it. It was infuriating because it was the only time he did that in the house. The switch to an artificial tree was met with some friction from the homemakers from deep in the brambles, not that we were concerned about the passive aggressiveness. We decided the gifts meant for the crotchety corner would be laid under a separate natural tree to be pissed on.

Though the wrapping paper might not be sticky this year, three of those cats will be experiencing their first Christmas. Reggie, in particular, is a wild child with a love for parkour. Juney is a ribbon eater. And Zero-F’s-Tux and Jinx-Owe-Me-A-Coke will have all the ornaments off the tree before it’s even set up.

Pet allergies might not be my greatest concern this winter.

Check Out Our Week 11 Fantasy Football Rankings ~

Week 11 Fantasy Football: Iron and Crimson

Fraught Iron

This millennium has gifted us with a couple of contentious decades between the Ravens and the Steelers. Most of those clashes focused on dominant defense on each side. I don’t get that vibe about this year’s interaction. The Baltimore defense has been a sieve, while the portly Pittsburgh unit from the beginning of the season has cooled off in recent weeks. Nevertheless, I feel the strength of both offenses might be lending influence. Lamar Jackson is playing at an unworldly level, while Russell Wilson has silenced a lot of doubters (including me). We could get a really modern shootout between two traditionally brutish teams.

Waldron Suck Boost

I’m not jumping ship on Caleb Williams just yet. He was issued a shit sandwich for an opening salvo with Shane Waldron. The reason Williams looks unprepared is because he and Waldron entered each contest without a working plan. We might be looking at a lost season for fantasy purposes in 2024, but the sky is still the limit as long as Chicago can agree not to hire another lemon at offensive coordinator.

Green Bay comes screaming in off their bye week and ready to light up the scoreboard. They mustn’t expect that to be easy against a swarming Bears pass defense. Jordan Love has a tendency to make mistakes against stronger defenses at a higher frequency. I still trust at least Jayden Reed and Tucker Kraft in this compelling matchup.

Bleu Cheese Pressing

What a great blessing this midseason overture is between Kansas City and Buffalo. I want to believe Josh Allen is ready to prove his team is a tier above the undefeated champs this season. The Chiefs have triumphed on shaky ground in consecutive games. I know neither of those teams are eye to eye with the Bills.

Patrick Mahomes and Travis Kelce have resumed their autumn waltz and are back in our good graces. Deandre Hopkins has exceeded my expectations. You really love to see it. For at least one more week, Kareem Hunt will have RB1 upside. The Bills have been a run funnel so far.


Find more spicy advice from Bo McBrayer on Bluesky or on  X (formerly Twitter) @Bo_McBigTime & up your kitchen pantry game with his custom spices and sauces at hotboxbatch.com.

By Published On: November 16th, 2024

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